I hate going to the doctor! I figure that someday it will be the last stop before I die. So as I drive to the doctor's office, I am trying to place myself somewhere on the "sickness scale"! And as most guys over 40 already know and those under 40 have yet to find out (hee,hee,hee), most maladys for the 40+ crowd can only be diagnosed manually! Gone are the days when the doctor can look at you and say,"measles", or "chicken pox". And after 40, nothing can be determined by examining the outside of you because on the outside, you start looking sick all of the time!
So as I sat on the exam table, I did what I always do. I started planning a quick escape and worrying about how much the medicine would cost. I continued to "will" away sickness. Yeah, I was actually feeling better. It's probably nothing. Lets keep this simple, and non-invasive please. The Dixie Cup test, blood test to check for hepetitis, (which would explain why I looked like a taxicab), X-rays to find a probable ulcer.
Then home to wait for the phone call to confirm...Nothing! No ulcer, liver okay, blood count slightly elevated, so back for more tests. "Yeah, right!", I thought. "You guys just have a yacht payment due!"
MRI revealed nothing. "Okay, Mr. Frank, we're gonna have to go in!"
Now it has to be mild insanity that makes me pay the medical profession to force me to swallow something that was not designed to be swallowed by human beings! But there I was, lying on the gurney, under way too mild sedation, staring at a 3-foot-long garden hose with an ultra sound camera on the tip of it and a metal claw to pinch off flesh, and being instructed to "not fight it" but to "swallow" when cued to do so!
"Doctor", I asked feebly, "Is there any other way?"
"Yes", he said, "but it is the longer route and no more pleasant!"
I said, "AAAHHHH!"
Mercifully, when the tube was fully inserted, I was put into almost total sedation, so I don't remember this part. But my wife, Brenda, who was sitting within earshot for this proceedure, says I was wretching and the nurses were loudly urging me to "relax and not fight it"! Sorry, I can't heeeaaarrr you! I've been "shish-ka-bobbed"!
As bad as it was, though, this amazing technology helped the doctor finally locate the problem, and stepping out to my wife, he announced regretfully ,"Your husband has cancer, and there is less than a 10% chance of him living 5 more years!"
This might have been the moment my wife coined the phrase,"There is nothing in life as shocking as the loss of it!" Her shock, fear, loneliness, and the testing of her faith that began at that moment is another story. One even I can barely comprehend.
She had followed me all over the country evangelizing, stood by me as a pastor's wife for several years, often working part-time jobs to help support us. And after 18 years of ministry, we had nothing! We were 1000 miles from home, in California, trying to start a church on a shoestring. We were broke, living in a rent house, had a car with only 2 of its 4 gears working, little food in the fridge, no life insurance, and no support financially from the organization we were a part of. It was a dark time.
Brenda D. Frank, as you are reading this blog, I want you to know how much I love you. In all of my life you have been the greatest blessing ! You have become "flesh of my flesh" and my very life is forever combined in yours. Thank you for saying "for better or for worse" 35 years ago! You really meant it!
Now, there are several spiritual metaphors and probably some great things about the events in this blog which would make great devotional points, but since I was unconcious, I didn't think of them, so I will have to end this one here and catch you later.
Love to all. Thanks for your kind comments. Please click "FOLLOW" to get notices when I post a blog.
Thanks for reading. I'm going to join my family for supper now.
Sam
So as I sat on the exam table, I did what I always do. I started planning a quick escape and worrying about how much the medicine would cost. I continued to "will" away sickness. Yeah, I was actually feeling better. It's probably nothing. Lets keep this simple, and non-invasive please. The Dixie Cup test, blood test to check for hepetitis, (which would explain why I looked like a taxicab), X-rays to find a probable ulcer.
Then home to wait for the phone call to confirm...Nothing! No ulcer, liver okay, blood count slightly elevated, so back for more tests. "Yeah, right!", I thought. "You guys just have a yacht payment due!"
MRI revealed nothing. "Okay, Mr. Frank, we're gonna have to go in!"
Now it has to be mild insanity that makes me pay the medical profession to force me to swallow something that was not designed to be swallowed by human beings! But there I was, lying on the gurney, under way too mild sedation, staring at a 3-foot-long garden hose with an ultra sound camera on the tip of it and a metal claw to pinch off flesh, and being instructed to "not fight it" but to "swallow" when cued to do so!
"Doctor", I asked feebly, "Is there any other way?"
"Yes", he said, "but it is the longer route and no more pleasant!"
I said, "AAAHHHH!"
Mercifully, when the tube was fully inserted, I was put into almost total sedation, so I don't remember this part. But my wife, Brenda, who was sitting within earshot for this proceedure, says I was wretching and the nurses were loudly urging me to "relax and not fight it"! Sorry, I can't heeeaaarrr you! I've been "shish-ka-bobbed"!
As bad as it was, though, this amazing technology helped the doctor finally locate the problem, and stepping out to my wife, he announced regretfully ,"Your husband has cancer, and there is less than a 10% chance of him living 5 more years!"
This might have been the moment my wife coined the phrase,"There is nothing in life as shocking as the loss of it!" Her shock, fear, loneliness, and the testing of her faith that began at that moment is another story. One even I can barely comprehend.
She had followed me all over the country evangelizing, stood by me as a pastor's wife for several years, often working part-time jobs to help support us. And after 18 years of ministry, we had nothing! We were 1000 miles from home, in California, trying to start a church on a shoestring. We were broke, living in a rent house, had a car with only 2 of its 4 gears working, little food in the fridge, no life insurance, and no support financially from the organization we were a part of. It was a dark time.
Brenda D. Frank, as you are reading this blog, I want you to know how much I love you. In all of my life you have been the greatest blessing ! You have become "flesh of my flesh" and my very life is forever combined in yours. Thank you for saying "for better or for worse" 35 years ago! You really meant it!
Now, there are several spiritual metaphors and probably some great things about the events in this blog which would make great devotional points, but since I was unconcious, I didn't think of them, so I will have to end this one here and catch you later.
Love to all. Thanks for your kind comments. Please click "FOLLOW" to get notices when I post a blog.
Thanks for reading. I'm going to join my family for supper now.
Sam
Dad, you are amazing! And thank you for sharing your story with everyone. No matter how much of it I know, it's always touching to get it from your point of view. I thank God for bringing us through that time in our lives. Keep 'em coming Dad! I love you!
ReplyDeleteWow! I want to laugh and cry at the same time. It is very hard for me to imagine the feelings you all must have felt as you faced this life issue for the first time. I can't wait to read the other chapters.
ReplyDelete