Chapter 3 Safe In A Whirlwind

I need to move through the actual medical events rather quickly so as not to join that rank of people my age for whom life revolves around their medical procedures!
Anytime dark mass and pancreas are used in the same sentence, it is mostly a sentence of death. People simply do not survive pancreatic cancer! This is because it develops quietly and by the time it makes itself known, it has usually metastasized (spread to other parts of the body). The pancreas serves 2 functions. The head of the pancreas provides enzymes which help digest fat and carbohydrates. The tail portion provides insulin. It is tucked in on the top of the first length of intestine out of the stomach called the duodenum. The duodenum is studded along its surface with lymph nodes which pick up and spread cell information, in this case cancer cells. Those who survive pancreatic cancer represent only 2% of the numbers. My tumor was on the head, or enzyme portion. I remember waking up in the hospital room with my wife standing by my bedside. After a gentle greeting and tender kiss she got right to the point. I don't remember what she said but the word cancer landed on my consciousness like a scream from somewhere far away. BUT, she added quickly, The doctor was recommending a surgical procedure call a "Whipple", wherein your abdomen is opened completely and several parts of your digestive system are removed and what remains is just sort of spliced back together. It is use only for certain types of cancer and at best it only buys a few years, like 5 to 10. It was determined that I was a candidate mostly due to my young (39) age.
That night, it was decided by my wife, with the diligent help of a couple who were attending the services in our home, that I should be transferred to Loma Linda University Hospital which was state of the art in cancer treatment. This was done that very night and the next morning I met my surgical oncologist Dr. Garberoglio, from Venezuela. the first thing he did was start me on a regimen of intravenous nutrition. Over the last 2 weeks I had lost so much weight as my body was going into toxic shock. By the time the tumor was discovered I had dropped from 205 lbs to about 160. So for 3 days I was pumped full of the most expensive milk shake in the world at several hundred dollars per serving. Options had not been discussed and odds were never mentioned as the whirlwind of care and preparation from a raft of Doctors, Interns, nurses, and all of my family and friends started, and somehow, I felt safe in the whirlwind. But the ominous hand of Fear was waiting to fall, and later, it would turn me every way but loose!
But I floated above all of this, mostly unaware of the phone calls and prayer that was mounting up on my behalf as my wife, family, and friends all over the country began to wage war in the spirit!
The doctor actually did 3 procedures. The first was to go in with a small tube and camera to see if the tumor was operable. The second was the actual surgery to remove 1/2 of my stomach along with the entire duodenum, the tumor with 1/2 of the pancreas, gall bladder, appendix and all the connecting glands and tubing. Then the remaining half of pancreas which provides insulin, was stitched into the intestine wall and that was reattached to what was left of my stomach. Drainage tubes were inserted for infection, and a feeding tube was inserted below the surgery site through which I would force Ensure liquid for nutrition for the next 2 weeks. I hate Ensure. Then I was closed up and parked in ICU.
The third procedure was an emergency repeat of the second one! I remember coming groggily out from under the anesthesia to a bustle of activity all over and around my bed. Nurses were yelling and running in and out of the room calling for Plasma! Strangely, I was acutely aware of my heart beating. It would beat strongly as the nurse squeezed the cold blood into my body and slow down when she stopped! I could feel my heart slowing down and remember thinking "Is this what dying feels like?" An artery had broken and I was bleeding out rather slowly. Soooo, back to surgery and re-open the incision, take everything out and lay it on the table to find the bleeder and repair it. I remember as the anesthesiologist was prepping my arm, a nice size earthquake tremor rocked the hospital and the lights went out and I was pinned to the gurney by all the staff! When the lights came on and everything was still I counted backwards and before saying 4, my lights went out!
I soon woke up in the ICU for the second time and the next day I was transferred to a private room to begin a 2 week recovery. The doctor visited me to give the bad news/good news. The tumor was malignant but did not appear to have metastasized! I was to recover and when I could eat normally I could go home. Then I would be scheduled for a 2 week regimen of radiation therapy and then begin a 12 month program of chemotherapy.
Loma Linda University Hospital is teaching hospital operated by the Seventh Day Adventists and I will be forever grateful for the world-class care I received from the doctors and staff there. Before beginning the chemotherapy, the doctor met with me and for 30 minutes we discussed my faith in God, without which he asserted, his best efforts were useless.
And so, 4 weeks after doctors found the tumor, I went home. I wept like a baby as I hobbled up the walkway and entered my home. There was no more sacred place on earth and the most magnificent cathedral on earth could not have filled me with such a sense of awe, humility, and gratefulness.
I wish you all a Merry Christmas and may God grant us all a great year for 2010!
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